As I thought about this conundrum, I hearkened back to another book I'd read called the Perks of Being A Wallflower. In the book, Patrick is giving Charlie advice on how to treat a girl. He says, "the key to girls is that they always want to change us." He then goes on to tell Charlie that if you change the challenge is over and they get bored, they "break up with your sorry ass." I think this is why the Bella-Grace's of the world of books are so attracted to the monsters. If Patrick's advice is sound, then the monster is the ultimate challenge, and therefore boyfriend. A monster is something always affiliated with evil in context. To change a monster to something good is almost nearly impossible, it takes perseverance and patience and often, love. The challenge is rich and tempting, everyone believing they can do it.
Bella believes that she can change Edward from careful and held back into someone who can actually have a relationship and believe in their supposed love. She pushes him to start the relationship in the first book, Twilight. Edward wants to keep his distance, he knows that he could hurt her, kill her even and he doesn't want to put her in danger. It makes him more appealing to her as she finds herself "going crazy" for him even more as she pushes him away. However, he gives in eventually, he is still a boy after all. Her next challenge is getting him to have a physical relationship with her. Again he is afraid of hurting her, damaging both her phsyce and body. Again Bella keeps pushing and pushing, trying to change his mindset and feelings toward himself, as he hates himself for hurting others and being a vampire. Bella is constantly trying to change Edward and his resistance just makes him more attractive to her.
While Bella is trying to change Edward's mindsets, Grace of the series Shiver by Maggie Stiefire is trying to change her boyfriend Sam's physical being. Sam is a werewolf, his shift is triggered by coldness. In the winter he becomes a wolf for the whole seasons, while in fall he can shift whenever it gets cold. When he is a wolf, he doesn't remember Grace, and his love for her, he disappears from her life. Fearing this time, Grace is trying to find the cure for his wolf-ness. Although Grace and Sam both want to be together all of the time, they are both most attracted to each other when their problem of werewolves is most intense. In fact, when they have sex for the first time it is after Sam has had a false alarm of almost becoming a vampire. The chase is what seems to turn Grace on.
Both of these girls speak longingly of the "happily ever after" in their respective book series, but both are still extremely attractive to their monster boyfriends when they are trying to change them. As Patrick told Charlie, "Girls-want-to change us." and these two female protagonists prove this.
